Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Whiskey+Metra Newsletter=Fun

Who knew that the Metra has a newsletter????? Not this girl!  It all started when I stopped by my favorite Ogilvie bar after working late.  I had 20 minutes to kill before my train, and I had every intention of boarding the train early and finishing up some paper work, BUT I couldn't help but notice a sign advertising a drink special on Manhattans.  I stopped in for 1, because it would be rude to walk past my favorite bar serving my favorite drink on special.  So, I had my drink and then boarded the train as planned...and that's when I saw it: the Metra newsletter.  It was the headline on the front page that caught my eye: "Shhh! Quiet cars to debut".  Praise the sweet little baby Jesus; it's about f***ing time!!!!!  After reading the article I found the most amazing thing: the Metra Soundingboard.  A forum for all of the tired, cranky commuters to provoke and insult each other.  Had I known of it's existence I may never have started this blog!  Naturally, I couldn't help myself and I emailed the following post:

"Title: Wilmette Wrangler
I would like to preface this rant by clarifying that I did not christen this woman the "wilmette wrangler" I just over heard her nickname from others who have experienced her wrath.  She really is the worst of the worst, takes up all 4 seats(during rush hour!!!)  at the end of the car with her various CVS bags and punishes anyone who sits across from her by piling her bags on them.  I am one of her many victims.  She treats the conductors like garbage and throws a screaming tantrum if anyone is sitting in "her" seat when she boards.  She is an infamous terror on the UP North line and needs to be taught a lesson- so I am going to sit in "her" seat as often as possible."

Like I said, couldn't be helped....liquid courage and what not.  Which brings me to my next brilliant idea!  I am going to share my favorite posts from the Sounding Board when I find ones that thoroughly entertain me.....STARTING NOW:

"Title: He's asking for it
For you people bashing the seat-hoggers: I am one of those people!  I can tell you one thing: I have to wake up at 4am to catch the train.  You betcha I am going to get the double seat on the top closest to the exit.  When you get on the train and I see you coming I act like I am sleeping.  Why, you ask?  Because some of you don't shower, or fart right next to me.  I for one am not dealing with this on my way to work.  I don't care how much you whine.  Your enemy the seat-hogger!!! Jake"

HOLY BALLSTEIN!  I don't know if I hate him or love him...can't decide

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